Princess Peach - Empress of the World (ladyofsalzburg) wrote,
Princess Peach - Empress of the World

Lighthearted Saturday amusements

I should be on my way to Twickenham at the moment, but I'm not (I have a cold and the thought of sitting in a car with 4 others for a couple of hours, then sitting in a grandstand in the cold and rain for a match that doesn't start till 5ish then a late night, doesn't fill me with much enthusiasm at the moment), so here are a couple of amusing things instead.

The best pie chart ever:
From Funny City


Things that are difficult to say when you're drunk:
a) Innovative
b) Preliminary
c) Proliferation
d) Cinnamon

Things that are VERY difficult to say when you're drunk:

a) Specificity
b) British Constitution
c) Passive-aggressive disorder
d) Transubstantiate

Things that are ABSOLUTELY IMPOSSIBLE to say when you're drunk:

a) Thanks, but I don't want to sleep with you.
b) Nope, no more booze for me.
c) Sorry, but you're not really my type.
d) No kebab for me, thank you.
e) Good evening officer, isn't it lovely out tonight?
f) I'm not interested in fighting you.
g) Oh, I just couldn't - no one wants to hear me sing.
h) Thank you, but I won't make any attempt to dance, I have no co-ordination. I'd hate to look like a fool.
i) Where is the nearest toilet? I refuse to vomit in the street.
j) I must be going home now as I have work in the morning.

From John's Jokes

Then there's always the Knights, or Twitter Knights, if you've seen them on there, but there are quite a lot, so maybe I'll actually put them in an entry of their own later.
Tags: funny, random, twitter

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